How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
