everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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