OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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