I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
