she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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