You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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