she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize