Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
