Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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