I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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