with your own penis?
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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