Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
