the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
barbara walters just said penis...
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
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She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
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