At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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