Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
