Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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