Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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