Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
