Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
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I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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