He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
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The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
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This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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