I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
