Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I'm both gender and math confused
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
