Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
