And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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