how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
