I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
