So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
