well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
