so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Randomize
