Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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