I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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