I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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