Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Randomize
