THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
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