So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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