That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
