your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Randomize
