4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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