I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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