Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Randomize
