Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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