dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize