I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
