So drunk its hurt
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
