it was like his penis was on wheels.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
