Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
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