And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
