drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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