is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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