So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
i think my cat just said my name.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
