I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Fuck appropriateness.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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